worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
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