My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
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