Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
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