Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
Randomize
