Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
Randomize
