I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
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