if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
how do flat chested girls get laid?
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
Randomize
