it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Randomize
