Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
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