check it out our google latitudes are spooning
so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
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