I wannas sexs uuuuu
Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
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