I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
Randomize