Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
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