We should be called the Road Head Warriors
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Randomize