i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
Randomize
