If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
Randomize
