It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
Can you bring me the toilet please
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
Randomize
