I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
He shit in the fireplace
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
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