why did i wake up with a kid named Raphael in my bed this morning?
I dont know but you did call last night to tell me you found the last ninja turtle
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
So I just went to clothing optional bar
Randomize
