That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
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