Dude I can't believe you let me go home with the wildabeast lastnight.
You always hook up with hot girls we had to know you were mortal
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
I have post one night stand depression
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
