Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
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