i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
Randomize
