Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
Randomize
