Don't you send me to vm
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Welp...herpes.
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
Randomize