Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
I'm sobbing to NWA
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
