just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize
