you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
How naked do you want me to be?
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
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