so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
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