But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Randomize
