I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Randomize
