the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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