in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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