when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
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