NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Randomize
