My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
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