do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
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