Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
Randomize
