Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
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