It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize