I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
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