i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
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