Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
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