Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
Randomize
