like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
Randomize
