So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize
