I will die if light touches me.
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
my brother wants to know why there are wet balloons in his bed and i think you forgot to throw the condoms away but im too hungover to check if thats what hes talking about
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize