If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
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