Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
I see more hoeing in ur future
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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