I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
this must be what syphilis tastes like
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
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